When someone we love passes away, whether it is a spouse, partner, or parent, the loss is more than emotional. It changes our daily lives in ways we can’t fully prepare for. The grief is real, and yet there is an immediate list of practical matters that still need to be handled. Between the emotional weight and the legal, financial, and logistical demands that follow, it is easy to feel overwhelmed and unsure where to begin.

This checklist is here to help. It is not meant to replace professional legal or financial advice, but rather to serve as a clear and compassionate roadmap during the difficult first weeks. By breaking the process into manageable steps, my hope is to help you stay organized, protect your future, and give you space to focus on honoring your loved one.

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Step 1: Gather important documents and information

The very first thing to do is get all critical documents in one place. This is the foundation for almost every other step you will take. Start with the will, trust, or any other estate planning documents. If none exist, you will likely need to work through probate, which is a court process that can take months to years depending on your state. You will also need your loved one’s Social Security card or number and, most importantly, certified copies of the death certificate. Order at least 10 to 12 through the funeral home, as some institutions will only accept originals and you may need several at the same time.

From there, collect bank, investment, and retirement account statements, property deeds, vehicle titles, insurance policies, and any business ownership or partnership agreements. If they had safe deposit boxes, locate the keys and check the rental agreement. In today’s world, digital access is just as critical. Gather passcodes for phones, computers, email accounts, cloud storage, and social media. Some families create a spreadsheet or “password vault” early on to avoid losing access to important records. If a letter of instruction exists, read it closely because it may contain details like funeral preferences, locations of hidden assets, or instructions for sentimental possessions.

Real-world tip: Create a “command center” binder or digital folder where you can keep scanned copies and originals organized. It saves enormous time when an attorney, financial institution, or family member asks for documentation.

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Step 2: Handle immediate needs

If there are funeral, burial, or memorial plans in place, follow them as closely as possible. If not, meet with family to make decisions together and avoid feeling pressured to rush. Contact the county clerk or recorder’s office to ensure the death is registered. Notify your loved one’s employer if they were still working, as this will trigger benefits processing and may provide unused vacation pay or final wages.

It is also important to secure the home. This might mean changing locks if keys were widely distributed, stopping mail or forwarding it to the executor, and pausing newspaper or package deliveries. Make arrangements for pets so their care is uninterrupted. If your loved one rented their home, notify the landlord promptly to review the lease terms.

Real-world tip: Assign specific tasks to different people. One family member can handle calls to employers, another can work on household matters, and you can focus on funeral arrangements. This prevents burnout and keeps things moving.

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Step 3: Review benefits and income sources

Survivor benefits can provide immediate financial relief, but they require timely action. Contact the Social Security Administration to see if you qualify for monthly survivor benefits or a one-time death payment. Reach out to pension administrators and annuity providers to determine if payments can continue to you or other beneficiaries.

Life insurance is another key area. Do not forget about policies through an employer, professional association, or even credit card benefits. If your loved one was a veteran, call the VA to check for burial allowances, pensions, or life insurance payouts.

Real-world tip: When filing claims, have the policy number, Social Security number, and a certified death certificate ready. Most claim forms can be downloaded online, but sending everything at once avoids back-and-forth delays.

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Step 4: Manage finances, debts, and credit

Go through all automatic payments tied to your loved one’s accounts, such as utilities, subscriptions, and insurance premiums. Transfer them to your name if needed or cancel them. Contact each creditor directly to notify them of the death and send copies of the death certificate when requested. Also notify Experian, Equifax, and TransUnion to place a “deceased alert” on their credit file, which helps prevent identity theft.

Remember that debts are generally paid from the estate, not by surviving family members, unless you were a co-signer or joint account holder. For investment or retirement accounts, contact the custodian to start the beneficiary claim process. Some distributions may have tax consequences, so get professional advice before cashing out.

Real-world tip: Keep a running list of every account closed, transferred, or paid. Six months later, you may be asked for proof, and this record will save you from retracing your steps.

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Step 5: Address tax matters

A final federal and state tax return will need to be filed for the year of death. If the estate generates income, such as from investment accounts, an estate income tax return may also be required. Depending on your state, there may be estate or inheritance taxes to address.

If you inherit property or investments, understand the “step-up in cost basis” rules. For example, if your parents bought a house for $100,000 and it is worth $400,000 when you inherit it, the cost basis resets to $400,000. This can save you substantial capital gains taxes if you sell.

Real-world tip: Work with a CPA who has experience in estate matters. Even small estates can have hidden tax traps, and it is far easier to address them early than to fix them later.

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Step 6: Take care of yourself

This step often gets overlooked, but it is essential. Grief can cloud judgment, drain your energy, and make decision-making harder. It is okay to ask for help, whether that is leaning on friends and family or joining a grief support group.

Real-world tip: If the calls, emails, and paperwork feel endless, set a boundary by designating “business hours” for estate tasks. The rest of the day is yours to rest, grieve, and begin healing.

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Step 7: Plan for your own future

Once the urgent matters are handled, update your own estate plan, beneficiary designations, and insurance coverage. Revisit your financial plan to ensure your income, investments, and retirement strategies reflect your new circumstances.

Consider creating a “just in case” file for your own affairs. Include your will, insurance policies, account passwords, and a list of key contacts. This is one of the most valuable gifts you can leave your loved ones because it spares them from the scavenger hunt you may have just gone through.

Real-world tip: Tell at least one trusted person where to find your documents. Having them organized is only useful if someone knows they exist.

Final Thought

Losing someone you love will never be easy, but having a plan for what to do next can make a painful time a little less overwhelming. This checklist will not erase the grief, but it can bring structure, reduce confusion, and allow you to focus on honoring your loved one while protecting your own future. Take each step one at a time, and remember that you do not have to do it alone.

If you need help navigating any of these steps, whether it is handling financial accounts, reviewing benefits, or planning for your own future, our team is here and ready to walk alongside you. Please reach out if you would like support during this time. You can book some time to chat right on my calendar here.

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